Your Focus is Everything

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding

Proverbs 3:5 NIV

I’d like to start the conversation today by telling you a story. 

A couple of years ago, I was at the store with my son.  We wandered over to the toy section of the store and I could see my son searching intently for something.  We moved quickly past everything pink, past the baby and toddler toys without even a glance, until my son came to an abrupt stop.  I knew that he had found what he was looking for when his eyes lit up, and a broad smile crossed his face. 

As if he remembered for the first time that I was with him, the child turned back to me, gazing up at me with those beautiful, hazel eyes.  Before us was an impressive display celebrating the 10^th anniversary of a popular video game, which happened to be one of my son’s current obsessions.  Little square boxes, embossed with golden letters were stacked artfully in rows.  These are referred to as “blind boxes” because you purchase them without knowing what figurine or toy is inside. 

My son took a deep breath and started his sales pitch to me:

“Mom, these are the SPECIAL EDITION blind boxes!” 

“They are TOTALLY valuable and rare!”

“I can’t believe we are SO LUCKY to even see these in the store!”

“Will you PLEASE buy these for me?  I’ll never ask you for anything else ever again!”

If you are a parent, you’ve no doubt been through some version of this conversation, too.  Here’s the thing—It was pretty close to Christmas, close enough that any fun things I purchased for the kids were stashed in the closet until wrapping day.  I inwardly assessed how these blind boxes would be perfect for Advent gifts and planned to purchase some.  But I didn’t want my son to think that he would receive any that day.

“Buddy, you can’t have any of these today,” I started to explain.

The smile disappeared from his face.  His shoulders slouched down.  The hope in his eyes seemed to dissipate in seconds.  He turned away from me and looked back at the display.

My son spent the next several minutes patiently trying to convince me (argue, really) that these were not ordinary, run-of-the-mill blind boxes, and as such, we would not be able to purchase them in the future.  The time was at hand, in his mind, and we were in perfect position to capitalize on the situation.

But—and here is the point I want you to know—he kept his gaze longingly on the blind boxes.  Not once did he look at me. 

With a knowing smile on my face that my son did not see because he was not looking in my direction, I reached over his head and started to grab boxes, one-by-one, and toss them in the shopping cart.  I marveled at the audacity of it all—I was literally giving him exactly what he wanted, as he complained that I was not giving him what he wanted.  I thought that, at any minute, he would catch on to what I was doing and be overjoyed.

I tell you the truth—my son never saw them in the cart and never saw them on the conveyer belt at checkout.  He was so focused on the little boxes, and the fact that I told him, “Not today, buddy,” several times, that he could not see that his blessing was coming, that it was literally at hand, just on a different timeline than what he hoped for.

As we were driving home (in silence, of course, since my son was upset with me), I congratulated myself on scoring great Advent gifts for my son.  I anticipated the look on his face after he had read the little laminated Christmas story verse from Luke 1 or 2 for the day, that he would see the object of his desire sitting underneath. 

As I was musing on that future time, the Lord spoke to me in my heart.

“You know, “ He began, “You do the same thing as your son—often.”

God had my attention.  I stopped congratulating myself on my gift-giving win.  Holy Spirit continued to speak. 

“How many times, do you suppose, My child, that you focus on what I have promised you, rather than on Me?”

I didn’t need to count to acknowledge that it was too many times, far too often.  I was immediately convicted, tears welling up in my eyes.  I remembered times when I cried out to God because I had not seen His promises fulfilled.  I remembered challenging Him on the veracity of 2 Corinthians 1:20, which says:

For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God.

2 Corinthians 1:20 NIV

I realized that God had orchestrated the entire episode for me to learn, repent, and grow.  He used my son to show me the folly of focusing solely on the blessing, and not on the One who “is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us” (Ephesians 3:20 NIV).   When you focus on the promise, rather than the Promiser, you will miss the blessing.  Quite frankly, focusing on the blessing puts you in danger of idolatry. 

If you have a difficult time differentiating between the two, imagine a loved one.  Imagine now that this very person, beloved to you, asks you for something easily within your capacity to give, and you decide to bless them with the gift.  Shortly after they ask for the gift, they remind you that they asked for it.  You have already purchased it, but you are waiting for the best time for them to receive it. 

Let’s say that months go by, and you still have not given them the gift, even though they keep asking.  They start to express concern that they have not gotten their gift yet.  Eventually, they may even question if you even listen to their needs, your goodness, or even your love for them.  This is idolatry, and in this case, it has displaced trust and faith.  This is what happens, I believe, when we focus on the when and how of God’s promises to bless us.

I believe that God loves when we ask for blessings.  I am positive that He enjoys having us dig deep into His promises and pray for those promises for ourselves and others.  Jesus Himself encourages us that we may

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.            

Matthew 7:7-8 NIV

But, when we ask, we

must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord.  Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

James 1:6-8 NIV

Since that day, as I find myself wondering on the if, how, and when God will move on my prayers, I am reminded of the lesson of those tiny boxes. There is even a beautiful lesson in the notion that my son did not know the contents of the box until he opened one of them.  Such is the same with God’s blessings.  We are not to know how He fulfills our prayers—only that what comes is best for us, and glorifies God as the beneficent Jehovah Jireh, the One who Provides. 

It’s best that way, don’t you think?  That’s where the immeasurably, exceedingly more comes from.  It always brings me back to 1 Corinthians 2:9, which says

‘What no eye has seen,
what no ear has heard,
and what no human mind has conceived’—
the things God has prepared for those who love him—

1 Corinthians 2:9 NIV

By the way, the blind boxes were a hit at Advent.  Praise God that my lesson yielded a blessing for my son to enjoy.